Quick! Finish this sentence with the first words that come
to you: Elderly people _______________________. Did you make a positive
statement? Then good for you; you haven’t bought into the stereotypes of this
youth-obsessed society! Or perhaps it’s just that you’re a “senior citizen”
like me who chafes at the persistently negative images of older people
presented in the mass media.
To judge by television commercials, the minute we turn 65,
we are all heading for that long decline into dementia, frailty, and,
ultimately, the nursing home. And then there are those ubiquitous mailings that
show up almost weekly in our mailboxes – the ones offering great discounts on
hearing aids or walk-in bathtubs.
Of course, the reality is that we do undergo age-related
changes, and many elderly people do require some kind of help. What’s also true
is that aging is not the same for everyone and to characterize a whole group of
people being exactly the same is grossly unfair. Something I recall from my
gerontology classes is the older the age cohort, the wider the variability
among individuals in that cohort. A group of 15-year-olds is much more alike
than a group of 80-year-olds.
The current trend of dismissing the elderly as irrelevant
does a great disservice not only to the elderly but also to society as a whole,
which is deprived of the richness of experience and wisdom born of living many
years on the planet. Wisdom, of course, is not automatically conferred with the
passing of the years but even those not particularly wise older people have a
wealth of practical experience and insights to offer.
And then there are those who have been dubbed “the
extraordinary old,” the ones who retain their curiosity, zest for new
experiences and joie de vivre. You probably know one or two, or perhaps you are
one. These people are real treasures and are likely to possess wisdom along
with their other traits. I like to think of them as true elders, the wisdom-deepers
and storytellers of our world.
So, how can our faith communities best serve their older
congregants and work to dispel the harmful myths surrounding old age? Many of
them offer specific programs for older people which serve their purpose but
still tend to separate them from other generations.
What we must do (and I’m sure some are already doing it) is
strive to see ourselves as a family in which every generation is valued, in
which older people are fully integrated into the life of the community and
intergenerational activities are encouraged.
Public perception of the elderly can and will change. May we
hasten the day when the finish to the sentence asked at the beginning of this
column will be “Elderly people rock!”
Nancy Flood-Golembeck is a retired teacher and longtime
member of the Baha’i Faith. In addition to serving on the local Baha’i
governing body, she is currently writing a memoir.